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Mentoring and being mentored could be one of the most rewarding things you will ever do. As many of you will already know, mentoring is where one individual provides support, encouragement and guidance to another, based on their own knowledge, life and experience. Mentoring often provides a two-way learning experience for both mentor and mentee, which can encourage deep satisfaction and numerous benefits in many personal, career, organisational and developmental areas.
We have all heard of the benefits of mentoring, and the varying contexts in which it can be used, but why do so many mentoring partnerships fail to achieve their desired outcomes? What are the key ingredients for a successful mentoring relationship?
Identifying and mutually agreeing on the exact roles and responsibilities of both mentor and mentee before you begin will go a long way to building a successful mentoring partnership. In addition, following some basic guidelines will help you get the results you desire from mentoring. The rest is up to you!
- Make a mentoring agreement. Specify how long your mentoring will continue and agree on a realistic end date (you can always negotiate an extension later). Agree to evaluate how the mentoring is going after 3-4 sessions so you can reflect and realign goals if necessary.
- Commitment to mentoring and being mentored. Enter a mentoring relationship only if you are prepared to make the time available to meet your responsibilities with the other person. Don't overextend yourself beyond what you are capable of achieving.
- Observe business etiquette! You are in a professional mentoring relationship and should use the same rules and etiquette you would with a work colleague.
- Always be punctual for your meetings (or phone calls).
- Give plenty of notice if you need to postpone a meeting or phone call.
- Stick to business. Small talk is a nice way to break the ice, but don't let this consume the time you spend together. Try setting an agenda if you find you digress too often.
- Speak respectfully of others. Always talk about your workplace, colleagues or personal acquaintances respectfully, during the course of your mentoring. Speaking critically of others reflects badly on you and there's always a way to rephrase what you say to get your meaning across without.
- Give the relationship some time. Mentors and mentees don't always "click" straight away; however, sometimes your differences can lead to the greatest learning opportunities for both mentor and mentee. Have at least 3-4 meetings before making a decision either way, and ensure you include an evaluation period in your mentoring agreement.
Mentor Responsibilities
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Mentee Responsibilities
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- Manage the mentoring process.
- at the first meeting make a mentoring agreement with your mentee and mutually decide how your mentoring relationship is going to work.
- set goals and agendas with your mentee and follow up on things from previous meetings.
- evaluate how the mentoring is going at the end of the evaluation period. Find out what is going well and what could be done better
- Be generous with sharing information, expertise and knowledge that your mentee will find useful.
- Promote your mentee by introducing them to new networks and people, and look out for opportunities on their behalf.
- Encourage your mentee by being a guide and help them clarify their direction. Encourage them to develop skills, and help them maintain their motivation levels and think of solutions to the issues they face.
- Ask your mentee what they want most from you, and how you can help them achieve their goal.
- Be a role model for your mentee. After all, they chose you because of your career, personal background, and status, and because they believe you are the best person to help them achieve their goals.
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- Commitment to learning and personal development by acting on useful advice or solutions provided by the mentor, being willing to learn new skills and making the most of new opportunities your mentor may create for you.
- Open communication. Listen carefully to your mentor and communicate freely with ideas and solutions. If your mentor suggests something you know won't work for you, explain why. Don't say you'll do it when you have no intention of doing so. Brainstorm until an effective solution arises, then act on it.
- Provide feedback. Provide your mentor with honest feedback on how you are going with their suggestions, and ask for their opinion on some of your ideas.
- Value your mentor. Your mentor is sharing valuable time and knowledge with you for free. Always be on time for your meetings, and make the most of it once you're together. Make sure you come away from each meeting with things to do that you can report back on next time you meet. If you are the first person your mentor has mentored, be patient and let your mentor know the best ways in which they can be of assistance to you. Mentoring is a two-way learning process.
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Catherine Seton is the Founder and Director of the Australian Women's Mentoring Network, an online network which facilitates professional and personal development through mentoring and coaching, based on inspiration, connection, sharing of information and engagement. www.womensmentoring.com.au.
Contact:
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Catherine Seton is a member of the Australian Women's Mentoring Network. Visit Catherine's AWMN profile (login required).
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